We Saw a Chicken …

Category: goatee-stroking musing, or something

  • raw spirit, it rips war

    Wendy sent me Iain Banks’s Raw Spirit for my birthday, and I’ve just finished it. I very much enjoyed it; it’s more of an autobiography by way of some whisky distilleries. We have favourite drams in common — Laphroaig and Balvenie being a couple — and we both have a failing for Mull Cheddar, the potency of which can only be described as sinus-clearing. It’s an amusing read, and you don’t have to be a whisky nerd or Banks geek to enjoy it.

    I applaud Iain Banks’s stand on the Iraq war, but I do wonder if he’s thought very hard about the the cause of the war. Banks witters on (sorry, but he does so, incessantly) about being a “petrolhead”, and describes his cars in intricate detail: LandRover TD5, BMW M5, Porsche 964 Carrera 4, Porsche 911, Jaguar MkII 3.8l. None of these have sane fuel economy, and fewer of these on the road might’ve meant we wouldn’t have needed to get palsy with the odious Hussein, then need to oust him later. Maybe the fumes — whisky, weed or petrol — went to Banksie’s head.

  • not there

    Shows how out of touch with the neighbourhood we are. We were going shopping at the local Food Basics, ‘cos we were a bit late for No Frills, and we found it was closed — since June 30th …

  • corgi with an IV

    we see some odd sites from the vet next door

  • Heartlands

    Heartlands; a fine British romantic comedy, in that it’s neither particularly romantic, nor particularly funny. It’s a meandering vision-quest on a Honda C50 by a lovelorn darts-obsessed newsagent. But it’s got music by Kate Rusby, and Royd Moor wind farm makes a guest appearance, so it’s okay by me.

  • BCG, RIP

    The scourge of British school life is going away: the BCG injection is being dropped. Thisteen year olds from the 1930s have sported suppurating left shoulders because of this. It was a favourite target of school bullies, being whacked on the tender injection site. My BCG scar, 23 years on, is greatly faded, but still there

    So goodbye, Bacillus Calmette-Guérin; we hardly knew you … ow, my BCG!

  • Hovis Presley, 1960 – 2005

    I rely on you

    I rely on you
    like a Skoda needs suspension
    like the aged need a pension
    like a trampoline needs tension
    like a bungee jump needs apprehension

    I rely on you
    like a camera needs a shutter
    like a gambler needs a flutter
    like a golfer needs a putter
    like a buttered scone involves some butter

    I rely on you
    like an acrobat needs ice cool nerve
    like a hairpin needs a drastic curve
    like an HGV needs endless derv
    like an outside left needs a body swerve

    I rely on you
    like a handyman needs pliers
    like an auctioneer needs buyers
    like a laundromat needs driers
    like The Good Life needed Richard Briers

    I rely on you
    like a water vole needs water
    like a brick outhouse needs mortar
    like a lemming to the slaughter
    Ryan’s just Ryan without his daughter
    I rely on you

    © H Presley 1994

  • phones in receivership

    Plaintive GO Train phone

    GO Transit —FYI
    Pay phones on trains are out of service
    We have just been notified that the company which provides the pay phones on board our trains has gone into receivership.
    These phones are now out of service until further notice.
    We regret the inconvenience.
    June 24, 2005

    So I guess nobody called after all.

  • back to school

    Staples have all their Back To School! stationery stuff. I always hated being reminded of this just before school was even out for summer. Yuck.

  • danger sign

    Danger: Fast Food Kills; made with St Claire Inc Sign Builder

    I’d hate to be the webmaster at St Claire, Inc this morning. Seems that dweebs like me have discovered Sign Builder 2.0, and are hitting it hard.

  • Is today the happiest day?

    According to Chris Arnall, today might be teh happiest day of the year. I mean, I know you’re all hyper ‘cos it’s my birthday and all, but you know, it’s not that big a deal …

  • Is this your hearse? Yearse!

    Licence plate of a hearse seen in Mississauga: R U NEXT.

  • good stuff from kennedy road and mississauga?

    Picked up some Old Credit Amber Ale. It’s good; comes in obscenely large bottles, so one will get you gently munted. Then, after dismantling the old shed (yeah!), we picked up some great beef noodle soup from Pho Vietnam on Kennedy north of Ellesmere. Yum!

  • solstice tristesse

    The days only get shorter from here on in, sigh …

  • … in which Stewart actually does something

    Today I built a shed, and put things in it. It wasn’t as if it was a difficult shed (just a Keter prefab), but I like to think of it more as a storage solution than just a shed.

  • All Is Not Green At The Viridian Design Online Store

    Strange that the supposedly deep green Viridian Design online store only features one organic item out of twenty six on sale …

  • “I cannot tell a Soft”

    I love the way the word softened has become a nice way of saying falsified, as in Ex-Oil Lobbyist Softened US Climate Research.

  • aargh, my eyes, my eyes!

    Hmm, my left eye has caome over all useless; all I can see is a flickering pattern in the middle. I haven’t had one for a long time, but I seem to remember this being the precursor to a migraine. Joy …

  • Lego, ergo sum

    … he returns to his building blocks in preparation for the exhibition, rummaging through a bag of Lego. “Hear that sound? They feel so great. You know that feeling, when your fingers are chafed because you’ve been sticking so much Lego together? And that sound!”

    Coupland continues to move his hand in a rhythmic, circular motion, making the hundreds of Lego bricks rattle up against each other. “I love Lego! I just love it!”
     — from Douglas Coupland has a plan: Let’s live in Legoland, The Globe & Mail, 4 June 02005.

    I have always loved Lego. Not in a grown-­man-­builds-­working-­model-­of-­Pickering-­A-­out-­of-­Lego-­Technic kind of way, which would be weird (and would be more than nuclear engineers could do with the real Pickering A). Lego was such an integral part of my childhood that there was seldom a seat cushion that didn’t have a brick or too under them. And by Lego, I mean the real stuff; hundreds of little regular blocks (mostly red), not the modern stuff that you can make a B’Zurqar Battle Cruiser out of just two simple pieces. Things made from Lego were abstract. You had to use as much imagination to believe they represented the object you set out to make, as to make the object itself.

    I predate Technic, though I had some of the proto-Technic gears and blocks. I used to make absurdly high ratio gearboxes out of the plastic spur gears and shafts, and crash them with satisfying gronks. We even made it to Legoland (for all of about 25 minutes), as we raced to catch the Esbjerg ferry in 1977.

    The article about Coupland set me off on a serious Lego tactile jones yesterday. The Eaton Centre was about to be a site of great disappointment when I saw stacks of Lego buckets by the door of Toys Toys Toys. And not just any Lego; this was a classic 4028 Creator set, with hundreds of simple blocks. And it was reduced to $13!

    So, yes, Lego still hurts to make — the sharp corners make a satisfying impression on the fingers. Prying them apart is still hard. And that sound!

    Lego Owl

  • now reading: Jean Shepherd

    Jean Shepherd‘s In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash. I have rather a failing for the works of midwestern humorists, and Shep reads like a hopped-up Garrison Keillor. You’d like him.

  • critter day

    The groudhogs of Ashtonbee Duelling Pomeranians, Yorkville A tiny pom pup snoozling, Yorkville

    First I saw groundhogs on Ashtonbee, then we saw Bill the Pomeranian Guy in Yorkville. He had a whole bunch of pups with him, and these little critters were friendly, fuzzy and fearless.