{"id":306,"date":"2004-08-13T22:40:23","date_gmt":"2004-08-14T02:40:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/?p=306"},"modified":"2004-08-13T22:40:23","modified_gmt":"2004-08-14T02:40:23","slug":"repeatedly-stabbing-myself-in-the-eye-with-a-hot-poker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/2004\/08\/13\/repeatedly-stabbing-myself-in-the-eye-with-a-hot-poker\/","title":{"rendered":"Repeatedly stabbing myself in the eye with a hot poker"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.fontshop.com\/freefonts\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"s_OlympukesLight2.png\" src=\"http:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/archives\/s_OlympukesLight2.png\" width=\"189\" height=\"189\" border=\"0\"\/><\/a><br \/>\n&hellip;&nbsp;would be more fun than following the Olympics.<\/p>\n<p>Seriously, if there&#8217;s anyone out there who thinks that the Limping Games is anything other than a cash grab for synthetic hormone-enhanced automata, I&#8217;d like to meet them&nbsp;&mdash; and mock them repeatedly with <em>&ldquo;You sad old man!&rdquo;<\/em> delivered in a scornful faux-Cockney accent.<\/p>\n<p>Take the 400m race, for instance. If I <strong>stayed in exactly the same place<\/strong>, I&#8217;d be back where I started 43.18 seconds before the world record holder, and what&#8217;s more, I wouldn&#8217;t even be remotely out of breath. And we give medals to people who run round in circles? Jings!<\/p>\n<p>The above image is a glyph from the Olympukes Light free font from <a href=\"http:\/\/www.fontshop.com\/\">fontshop<\/a>. It speaks to my condition.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&hellip;&nbsp;would be more fun than following the Olympics. Seriously, if there&#8217;s anyone out there who thinks that the Limping Games is anything other than a cash grab for synthetic hormone-enhanced automata, I&#8217;d like to meet them&nbsp;&mdash; and mock them repeatedly with &ldquo;You sad old man!&rdquo; delivered in a scornful faux-Cockney accent. Take the 400m race, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1,2],"tags":[1794,62],"class_list":["post-306","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-general","category-goatee-stroking-musing-or-something","tag-olympics","tag-rant"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pQNZZ-4W","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/306","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=306"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/306\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=306"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=306"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/scruss.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=306"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}